Wednesday, April 20, 2011

Zombies Are Distracting!

Zombies Are Very Distracting
By Syria Evans of Syria Says Reviews

I probably have over 125 books in my queue and I’m still not anywhere close to being caught up on them. The response to Syria Says has been both overwhelming and awesome and for that, I am eternally grateful. It’s been wonderful, y’all!

But, of the five or six people that I actually know - not counting my family (which I have yet to meet my actual family as the people that raised me claim that I was left on their doorstep by gypsies) – I would say that I read quite fast and am even able to comprehend most of what I ingest (literarily speaking, of course). But, I feel like I’m not making a dent in the growing list and here I sit…still not reading. But, this bloggins is important too. So, I give myself a pass. So there.

My days usually follow this kind of a pattern:

Basically, if a book catches my attention in the first, let’s say 2 or 3 paragraphs, I can power through one 280-page book in an average 8 hour work day. (I tend to try to stretch it out over 2 days because I don’t want to give the impression that I’m a slacker at work.) I know that may not seem like a great accomplishment, but given that I suffer from some srrss ADD and actually work at least 3 to 4 hours of said workday, it gets a little bit more srrss, doesn’t it? And I do mean “srrss” like as in: “That chick can SRRSSLY read with the quickness!”

But, the problem is that every book I read and review may not grab me like a hungry zombie in a cemetery on Halloween; I may end up languishing somewhere between, “Well, it’s goooood…? It doesn’t make me feel like running to the nearest living thing and killing it? It’s a slow starter? It gets better?” and “OH. MI. GOD! WILL THIS WORD CIRCUS OF A BOOK NEVER END?! *sets self on fire*”

Normally, I push through them. I try to read them for what they are: labors of love full of the author’s blood, sweat and tears. I try to tell myself that just because I didn’t get it or enjoy it, doesn’t mean that another person won’t love it. I also try to remind myself that, “No, the author is NOT trying to bore or offend or depress me. They just chose a topic and/or a style that isn’t my cup of tea.”

(Now, I know what you’re thinking: you’re probably wondering if I haven’t been all that honest with my reviews given that none of them are below a 3 star rating on my site, but if you paid any attention to how I rolled, you would know that I don’t post any reviews below a 3 star…so BAM! The moral integrity of remains uncompromised.)

At any rate, I have had only a couple books that have not struck my fancy and those I have handled in the best way I know how: avoidance. No. I’m kidding. Actually, I try to read through them, find some positive aspects and attempt writing a review. Then I try to email the author.

Full disclosure: I have not yet actually emailed any authors because I worry about rejection.

Not me rejecting them, but them rejecting me and my silly “opinion.” I know that a lot of authors stoically say that, “Reviews aren’t for the authors; they’re for other readers.” And I applaud them for that. But, I’m going to be honest: they still hurt. Even when they come from a positive place or someone as sweet, kind, benevolent, generous, tall, awesome and modest as myself. (One or more of those adjectives may not be entirely accurate.)

I have come close; I’ve even typed up a few of the emails. But, I haven’t sent them yet. I guess I lack the cojones that the Internetz can provide for some people. I guess the ultimate question for me would be: if I did send these emails, would the author hate me forever?

Or if they didn’t hate me, would I actually make a positive impact on their writing and their future in the literary world?

Would you hate me?

Does it always matter what one person writes?

It mattered to you when you wrote your book.


  1. I love Syria Says website and I really enjoyed this guest post. She has a uniquely fun style to her reviews and a great attitude that shows on her website. Thanks for posting this. I enjoyed it immensely

  2. If I am due one of those emails, I would rather know that you won't be reviewing my book than wonder forever when the review will come out.

  3. I could never hate you. Of course, you like my book, so I might be biased :).

    This is pure comic brilliance right here - “OH. MI. GOD! WILL THIS WORD CIRCUS OF A BOOK NEVER END?! *sets self on fire*”

    I've felt that way sometimes when writing, fortunately not while writing fiction, but I know of what you speak.